Be careful other people are watching

In our personal lives as well as our business lives it is important that we always keep in mind the fact that someone is watching. Our attitudes and our actions are under inspection continuously by those around us whether we know it or not.

Here is an example, I was on a business trip in Georgia and had taken a lunch break back at my hotel. As I ate I stood in the window of my fifth floor room and looked out over a sea of cars that filled the parking lot. Below me a young man was walking along behind the row of cars against the building and as he passed mine he stopped, walked up to it and wrote something on in the dust that covered my window.

After I had raced across the room to get the keys and set off the alarm to give him a start something dawned on me. What are the odds that I would be in my room eating lunch looking out the window at the exact time that this person would walk by and choose my car out of hundreds to write on?

So often we are completely wrapped up in our own issues or activities and we forget that the people around us are watching. Maybe they are fellow employees and they see or hear us constantly complaining or badmouthing others. How does that affect their respect for us, the way that they interact with us, or their willingness to go the extra mile for us when needed. How about a business owner that treats people poorly outside his business and has forgotten that all of the people that witness his actions or attitude are potential customers and will tell on average three others about what they saw. Or the police officers who get together every Friday afternoon for a few beers and get obnoxious and boisterous, how does that effect the public's perception of our law enforcement officers.

If we want people to treat us with respect or to look at us as professionals then it is important that we monitor our words and deeds to ensure that we live up to that. Often times if we took a close and very honest look at our own attitudes and actions we have not earned the right to be treated with such high regard. I can think of many examples in both my personal life and business life where there was animosity about something and I was convinced I was right. However when I stepped back and took an honest look at how I was behaving, what I was saying, or how I was saying it I was hit with the hard realization that I was either part of or the entire problem and I had been making it worse by blaming others.

So as you move thorough your days and weeks keep this in mind. Whether we like it or not people observe our actions and attitude and then judge us by them so be careful you never know whose watching.

Focus on one goal and build on success

The New Year is upon us and I am sure that you have each set your goals for this year. If not then I encourage you to ask yourself why. If it is common knowledge that people who set, write down, and plan out goals are more successful and make more money then why wouldn’t you do it. Here is great exercise that I am doing that may help about choosing and focusing on one goal. This exercise was taken from the video by Brian Tracy: If You Could Achieve One Goal in 24 Hours

- Write ten goals you want to accomplish in the next 12 months
- Ask yourself if you could only accomplish one goal on this list and I could accomplish this goal within 24 hours, which one goal would have the greatest positive impact on your life?
- Circle that goal, set a deadline for that goal
- Make a list of everything that you can do to achieve that goal
- Begin working on the goal and be sure to do something every day

Sometimes we can overwhelm ourselves with the laundry list of things that we want to accomplish. With this exercise we are able to focus on one thing that will have an impact on our lives and see measurable results. That in turn will help motivate us to move forward on other goals because there is no better motivator than success.

The Mirror

It has always intrigued me how people will do or say almost anything to avoid the facts and find justification for their action or even their lack of action. One of the hardest things for many people to do is to look into the mirror and recognize their own responsibility in any given situation. Often we look around us to find some environmental issue or another person to blame which of course is much easier because it does not require us to feel bad or make any changes. We can justify anything simply by changing the way we look at it. People are accustomed to hearing me say that “life is all perspective” it is simply how you look at it and that rarely fails to be true.

How many times has something happened and without hesitation you had one or two reasons (excuses) ready for why it happened. How many times have you set a resolution, goal, or simply said that you were going to do something and failed. Now ask yourself this question how many times did those reasons involve you being at fault. If it was rare, if there always seems to be other influences or people that cause these things then we have to assume one of two things. Either you are an amazing person who always says and does the right thing or you are reluctant to analyze your own impact on those situations and act on what you find.

For example; you have a good friend that you spend a lot of time with and who means a lot to you. You enjoy the fact that you can always share things with this person and are secure in their confidentiality. This person is not only always there for you but also seems to go the extra mile for you on a pretty regular basis. They are kind and considerate and often will put your wants or need in front of their own. Suddenly this person starts seeming distant, stops calling you, and stops inviting you to do things. You get angry and confront this person which makes them angry. They point out some of your faults during the heated debate and you go your separate ways. Has this ever happened to you? Maybe not exactly like that but at some level with friends, family, or even coworkers? It is easy to point the finger of blame at this person and trust me if you think hard enough you will probably come up with enough things to have them banned from the community. However before you make that call ask yourself these questions, am I a giver or a taker in this relationship? Do I invest my time and actions to help this person, make this person feel better, or ensure that this person is getting what they want, or am I always finding things they can do for me? Did I say or do something that I should not have? Did I not say or do something that I should have? Did I overreact to the situation? Analyze these things from their perspective not yours and if you say you don’t know their perspective than you already have your answer go apologize!

This same principle applies to our personal and business goals as well. If we set a goal to lose ten pounds and fail is it really because we didn’t have a diet partner, no place to exercise, or can't afford healthy food. Or was it simply because we ate the wrong foods when we went out, refused make time for exercise, and always found a birthday, holiday, or random celebration which required eating and drinking to much of the wrong things. If you are in sales and your numbers are down was it entirely due to the economy, your region, your tools, the lack of tools, your manager, or you coworkers or was it that you did not set clear written goals, train, organize your time, prepare for selling, get in front of prospects enough, and then use what you had learned to close the deal?

Take the first step, look into the mirror, be honest and tell yourself what you see. Then come up with ways to improve in the areas that need it, and most importantly take action now. Do not procrastinate as that is a certain recipe for failure.